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ON HER first day in the bakery shop, my friend's first customer ordered one of the cakes on the counter. He asked if they were fresh, and Josee assured him they were. After she made the sale, Josee went to the back room to confirm with her boss that she had charged the right amount for the cake on the counter. "What cake on the counter?" her boss asked. That's when they realized Josee had just sold a $20 plastic display cake.

AWAITING my turn at the bakery, I heard a prospective bride give the cake decorator a hard time as she previewed her wedding cake. She demanded many extras and was critical of the work he'd done so far. After she left, he muttered, "I'm glad I put my special golden award on this cake — that young woman is sure eligible for it." Curious, I studied the cake closely, but saw nothing. Finally he pointed to the tiny bridegroom atop the cake with his tiny bride — and then I saw it. Barely visible was the "golden award" — a tiny wedding ring inserted in the groom's nose.

ONE day a man from Mars landed on Earth and went into a bakery. "Hey," he said to the owner, "what are these small wheels?"  "They're not wheels," replied the proprietor.  "They're bagels. Here, try one."  The Martian did.  A beatific smile crossed his lips, "Wow!" he said. "These would go great with cream cheese and lox!"

OUR son, who works at a bakery after school, saw me set the timer for a batch of cookies and suggested that I really didn't need it. He never uses a timer at the bakery, he said, and he has several ovens to watch simultaneously. "So how do you manage to take out each tray as it's done?" I asked. "That's easy," he said grinning. "The boss always tells me, 'Brown, it's done. Black, you're done.' "

I WORK behind the counter at a small baked goods store. One day a young boy came in, and I asked if I might help him. "No thanks," he replied. "I'm just smelling."

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Last updated May 19, 2008 by Becquet's Custom Programming